By Shenitha Dorsey, 16 and pregnant.
Jessica Tyler, who plays Jenna on TeenNick's Degrassi, asks, "Did you know that if you have sex without protection on a regular basis you have an 85% chance of getting pregnant within a year? Or that nearly a third of girls in the U.S. get pregnant by the time they turn 20? Pregnancy is 100% avoidable."
Did you know that nearly 3 in 10 teen girls in the US will get pregnant at least once before age 20? That's more than 700,000 teen pregnancies each year. Yikes.
So what does this mean for you? Well, you hear about teen pregnancy in movies, in the news, at school, on MTV, and from your parents. You know it's not a good idea to have a baby before you're ready, so why are so many teens still getting pregnant every year? And what can you do about it?
Babies are great—they’re cute and cuddly and they love you. But they’re also needy and selfish—they want all your time and attention and they want it NOW. Be honest—there are a million things you'd rather be doing than changing a diaper, right? So if you decide to have sex, have you considered the consequences of getting pregnant/ causing a pregnancy? Weirdly enough, almost 50% of teens have never thought about how a pregnancy would affect their lives even though having a baby could be one of the most life-changing things to happen to them. Consider this:
School comes second:
A baby won’t make him stay:
It’s hardest on the kids:
Now you know why having a baby too early is a bad idea. So how do you prevent too early pregnancy?
Start by thinking it through carefully yourself. Are you ready to have sex? Are you going to wait? Though there are a variety of ways to avoid pregnancy, they can be boiled down to two basic strategies:
Whether you choose to have sex or not, it is important to be able to talk about it with your partner. Having direct conversations about sex can be difficult or embarrassing, but if you are confident about your facts and able to express openly how you feel it should be easier. So take some time to get informed and to think through what feels right for you. It may be helpful to talk these decisions over with a close friend, parent, doctor, or other trusted adult before you talk to your partner. When you are clear about your own feelings, it will be easier to communicate them to someone else. And don’t wait until you’re in the heat of the moment to make these decisions—having a plan means being prepared before you’re in the moment.
So you think teen pregnancy is a problem? Want to do something about it? There are organizations in many communities devoted to preventing teen pregnancy—they are affiliated with churches, synagogues, schools, independent clubs, non-profit organizations, health centers, and reproductive health organizations. Contact your local school board, faith leaders, youth groups, and others who are concerned about young people. You can also talk to parents and teens and educate them about the consequences of unprotected sex and teen pregnancy. In fact, one of the most important things anyone can do is to make sure parents and teens talk about these issues and know the facts.
If you're already a teen parent, all the stuff on this page might sound like it's meant to hurt your feelings. We know that our message might unintentionally offend teen parents and we hope that you don’t take what we're saying here the wrong way. While your experiences as a teen parent may be very positive, we know that the majority of teen moms and dads have an incredibly difficult road ahead for themselves and for their children. We are by no means trying to insult you as a teen parent or make you feel like you've made a bad choice, but are instead hoping to help all teens realize the consequences of having children too early.
We know that you love your family very much and are working hard to support them while still doing all those things that make being a teen fun. Best of luck to you and your family!
http://stayteen.org/teen-pregnancy
Hey, I’m Adam
Visit us on Facebook! or email me
“We’ve created a place on the internet for you to ask the questions you’ve always wanted to ask. So take a look around, then let us know what you think about it. You might make a really good point about something, then see what others think about it as well. It’s getting involved, and sharing ideas about all kinds of subjects.”
Hi I'm Adam. I joined this web site because I really appreciate what In Search of Me Cafe is trying to do. When I was faced with tough choices I never really had a lot of people to talk to. Often I was embarrassed asking for advice on awkward stuff from my friends and family. I think if there had been an In Search of Me Cafe when I was making tough decisions it would have really helped me.
Any way enough about why I like this site so much. I have always liked to party and I love chillin’ with my friends. Obviously partying can lead to some tough life choices; I had my first alcoholic drink when I was 13. That may seem pretty young but I grew up in Europe where the legal age was 16. Yes I know... that’s still underage.
It’s true, I was underage. It’s easy to drink when your friends drink. Needless to say, from the first drink till now, I have experienced a lot. Partying was probably the best tool in learning about me which may seem strange but I really learned a lot about how I treat my friends and relationships, how I trust …you name it. Good times and bad I have gained valuable life lessons. If you ever need to talk about stuff or you have a question you’re burning to ask or if you just wanna share stories. Go ahead and holler. I won’t judge and it’s pretty hard to faze me. I’ll give you my honest opinion and you never know, you may have an experience that’ll teach me some things too.
Hey, I’m Taran
“Every teen has to face the same type of problems and try to figure out who they are. This is a place where you can do that.”
Hey, I’m Maddie
“Up until this year I was picked on a lot and it really brings down your self esteem. Kids don't think about how they're really affecting other people with their words and eventually the other kids' self esteem goes down and down and they start to believe what the bullies are saying. After a while you just start to give up and think, ‘Oh, what's the point. I suck anyway’ and your grades and everything else goes down.”
Hey, I’m Chelsi.
Visit me us Facebook! or email me
Each morning I see in my mind what I’m working hard to obtain. I know I can achieve anything I set my mind on by putting in the time & effort needed. I believe one can learn from every experience. I like to ‘take the best and leave the rest’!“
As a rule I don’t like talking about myself. However, I want you to know a little about me, the “teen” likely not much different than you and thinking a lot of the same things and having similar questions etc.
I try to treat everyone with respect and kindness, just as I would hope to be treated! Hopefully I can help answer questions you may have or concerns you don’t want to discuss with an adult… you know teen-to-teen!
Here’s a bit of what I like to do…. I love hanging with my friends at the movies or the mall, and staying in with my family. I love music, sometimes when I’m upset or “heartbroken” I go in my room and just listen to music. It just lets me cool off and just not have to think.
Although I’m only 13 on paper, I’m told I’m much wiser than my years. If there is a problem, I am the first person anyone calls. I may be nice but, if someone hurts anyone I know (whether I like ya or not) they are in trouble… haha. They call me “the haha queen” because I can make any situation funny.
I hope after hearing this little bit “about me” you want to ask me your questions, and if you just want to chat, I’d love to. I like meeting new people.
-Chelsi♥ Archambeau
“And it's now, now or never when we're chasing our dreams.” -Mercy Mercedes
“I'd like to make myself believe that planet Earth turns slowly.” -Owl City
“Do you know what's worth fighting for? When it's not worth dying for?” –Green Day
What my friends have to say About me - Chelsi♥ ……
“I like talking to you because you can always make me feel good about myself and make me happy no matter what. I like you as a person because you really are a great friend and I thank you for being there for me, and you’re just fun to be with.” -Jessie
“It’s hard.. To put into words.. The uncanny ability you have to put a smile on my face and that’s just online, from reading the nearly poetic replies. Where as over the phones it’s near impossible to explain the warmth that washes over me when I hear your voice. For some reason when I heard you for the first time. Chelsi you inspired my first poem I wrote … -Sean
Hey, I’m Brittany
“When people go to parties just to hang out, other people come and bring drinks or cigarettes, and try to get you to do it. They keep trying and trying to get you to drink or smoke, and you might be tempted do it because you want to be known as a cool person.”
Hey, I’m Trent
“I have cousins my same age and younger who are Haitian and Filipino, which allows me to connect with other cultures. Even with different styles and different issues, these other teenagers still have some of the same dramas we have here in America, such as peer pressure.” Hey, I’m Trent
Hey, I’m Forrest
“You can post video blogs on this site -- voice your opinions about topics here as well as responses to what others are saying in their blogs. So it kinda builds upon itself.”
Hey, I’m Connor
Hi, I’m Connor Cottle. I’m 17 and a junior at Fernandina Beach High School in northeast Florida. As an only child, my friends are really important to me, so I’m either hanging out with them or texting them when we’re apart.
I spend my free time on the tennis court, the golf course, and at the beach. I volunteer frequently around my community and enjoy every minute of it.
I am also the Lead Youth Advisor of the In Search of Me Café program and I’m involved because I like how connecting teens all over the world can help them help themselves.
I’m always around if you need any advice or if you just want to hang out.