Teen pregnancy has been increasingly apparent in schools all over the nation chiefly due to the average teenager's nonchalant mindset toward sexual intercourse, in my opinion. I live in Nassau County, Florida, which happens to be the county with the most teen pregnancies in Florida, according to recent statistics. It is evident that there are disconnects between the teens that need more information and guidance regarding responsible intercourse and the community leaders that should be more willing to offer guidance. Being part of the “Bible-Belt” in the South, authority figures such as principals, counselors and church leaders are sometimes ignorant about these issues because they want to imagine that all teenagers are waiting until marriage to have intercourse. These illusory perceptions hinder the teenagers’ reception of any useful information. The authority figures always contend “Teens do not need this information until they are out of high school and are more mature.” Obviously that is completely erroneous because, not only is teen pregnancy a problem all over the nation, Florida is ranked  6^th highest in rates of pregnancy in women aged 15-19 with 97 teen pregnancies out of 1000 teens (9.7% of teens being pregnant). It is clearly evident that we need more accessibility to more effective contraceptives, more information that isn’t heavily filtered by closed-minded community leaders, and better guidance regarding the issue. This is why In Search Of Me Café is vital to teenagers that want to seek sufficient guidance and information about these issues.

       -Connor

    The worst thing that could ever happen in a relationship is being abusive. Sometimes people are so head over heels for this person they don't realize that this person is not treating them properly.

    When someone says the word abusive what do you immediately think of? Punching and physical injuries; am I correct? Well I would think the same thing, but I know thats not just what abusiveness represents. Verbally fighting with someone to the point where they are emotionally hurt is considered abusive.

    Thankfully I have never been abused in any kind of way. Although just recently my best friend got in a huge fight with her boyfriend. He picked out every flaw about her, cursed her off, and anything verbally abusive you think of. He was so mean that it drove her to dumping him. Thank god nothing happened after the break up, he just let her be. Thankfully she was capable of figuring out she was abusive but others are not, which can lead to worse.

It is well-known that high school relationships carry a multitude of vices and virtues. These relationships are brimming with drama, infatuation, pressures, insecurities, impulses, and capricious judgments. However, they often bring happiness, contentment, and security to those who understand and respect the relationship and their partner. High school relationships also instruct important interpersonal and intrapersonal skills. The experience gained by these relationships can benefit your comprehension of yourself and future partners. In contrast, others might contend that most high school relationships end after graduation, therefore defeating the purpose of investing your time and energy into forming an intimate relationship. It is true that only 5-8% of high school relationships lead to a healthy marriage but that isn't a compelling reason to exclude yourself from the lessons and essential learning experiences of close relationships. The virtues of participating in wholesome relationships heavily prevail over the hurdles that you come across along the way.

                   -Connor Cottle

Regardless of the fact that adults are reading this and regardless of the fact that a lot of these bloggers seem to be younger or don't have a boyfriend and regardless of what people might think, I'm going to come right out and say it because I think it might help some of you. I've had sex. Now I'm not here to persuade you to sleep with someone but I'm not going to tell you it's a sin either. I just felt that a certain view point wasn't being written about.

The decision to have sex was a big one. I discussed it with my friends and my parents before I made the choice that was right for me. Of course, I did my research and I knew full well what I was doing and I made sure that it was the right person but in the end it all came down to what I wanted to do. The decision shouldn't be because all your friends are doing it or because you want to seem older or more mature or because you just want to get it over with or you want to defy your parents. If you want to have sex at all, you should do it for the right reasons. 

A close friend of mine has been raised thinking that you should wait until marriage. When I talked to him about my opinion on the matter, we argued a lot. Just because you don't see eye to eye with someone, doesn't make either of you wrong. Sex is a very personal and controversial subject, especially when it comes to teenagers. Don't let any one else influence your opinion. You should never be pressured into doing something you don't want to do, especially when it's such a big decision.  If you want to have sex, do it because it's the right choice for you and no one else (and be safe if you do do anything).

If you have any questions about my personal experiences or about my reasons behind choosing what I did, don't hesitate to ask.

-Kelsey

    In my school something is always happening. Either someones fighting someone, or someone just got suspended. The biggest thing that happens is when people start to date. Recently my friend just started dating this kid. I absolutely love him he is so nice to her and he would never hurt her. What concerns me though is she acts so different now. She is always wearing make up and dressing differently ,of course she looks great but its just not her. I just have this horrible feeling that if he wants to do things with her she will, even if she doesn't want to.

    There was no way for me to really react to this except to confront her. So yesterday I told her how I felt and she agreed. Once today came i was excited to see if she would start being herself again... and she was. I felt very happy that i took the step to confront her.     

    I guess my point is if your ever in a relationship never let it change you. Always be yourself and if you don't feel comftorable doing something you don't want to do with that person than say no. If that person gets mad then that shows they don't respect you.

-Jaclyn

Lets say you log into Facebook and you look at the news feed; what do you see "Jane Doe and John Doe" are in a relationship. That's fantastic but, do they understand what being in a relationship means? 

From my view, to say that you're in a relationship with someone is you saying you know this person for who they are and what they believe, that you have things in common, you can trust them, and simply enough you enjoy spending time with them. 

Can you honestly say that someone you just met at a party two days ago, knows who you are? Because I sure don't know someone after two days. They might be able to say "hey this person seems really nice and we seem to have a lot in common, I'd like to get to know you more" If more people our age did that, they'd probably have more successful relationships.

To sum up what I'm trying to say, I see nothing wrong with dating in your teenage years, but don't just say yes because your friend likes that boy or that girl. Say yes because you like who they are. I do have a boyfriend, I've known him for 2 years; he helped me through a lot of hard things in the past couple of months and, I love the fact that I can call him my best friend, or my boyfriend.

So, first things first. I'm 16 years old, I have a boyfriend and I go to a school where it's not uncommon to hear about students having sex. 

Most of time, parents have "the talk" with their kids after they see a video in health class in Middle School and then the topic is dropped. In Middle School, having sex seems like something you would never consider until you are much, much older but as you grow up and hormones kick in, you may consider it. Many people decide not to have sex until they are married or in college. Others (like some people at my high school) made the decision to lose their virginity before then. No matter what your choice may be, the number one thing you have to do is be educated. Be safe. The number two thing? Discuss it with your parent or guardian. 

One of the hardest things I've done in my life is starting a conversation about sex with my mom but I'm so glad that I did. By just throwing the subject out in the open,  I got to hear my mom's opinion on the subject and was able to give my own. I also learned things that I couldn't have from health class or research. It may have been hard, but I've never regretted my decision to spark a conversation. 

Your parents know more than you do and they can talk from personal experience when it comes to sex. Above all, they want to make sure you're safe. Show them how mature you are by starting the conversation. Even if you aren't considering having sex anytime soon, developing an open relationship and being able to talk freely about any subject will pay off when you do. Don't rely on that one "talk" you had in Middle School. Talk to your parents. Trust me, it's worth it. 

-Kelsey

To be honest, I haven’t had much personal experience with dating. My parents want me to wait until I’m 16 to date, which is really pretty lame, but I’m actually okay with it for my own reasons.

Like most of my friends, I’m 14. We can’t go anywhere unless someone takes us there and we can’t pay for anything unless someone gives us money. It’s almost like make-believe dating, if you think about it. Most of the time, “dating” for a lot of my friends really means going out with a different person each week just so they can say they’re with someone. They hold hands and kiss between classes and they text and Facebook each other until they get sick of the relationship and move on. It just seems so pointless.

When I do start dating, I want it to be something that adds to my life, not something that subtracts from who I am or what I want for myself. I never want to be one of those girls who fails at school and sports and clubs because all she can think about is some guy. I never want to be one of those girls who changes who she is and what she likes every time she has a new boyfriend. I want dating to be fun, a way to get closer to someone I like…but I don’t want it to take over my life and personality.

Most of all, I want to be respected. Have you ever heard of a “Moped Girl?” You know, like a moped…guys think they’re fun to ride but they don’t want their friends to see them with one. You know the type of girl…she’s prettier than she thinks she is, and smarter, too, but she doesn’t know it. So she lets guys walk all over her. Next thing you know, she’s willing to do anything for a guy’s attention. She thinks she has a “boyfriend” or she’s going on “dates” but the reality is that she’s just being used. She doesn’t respect herself, so no one else does either.